We\u2019re a small but dedicated group, meeting once a month at the Food Court at the Big Y. You probably haven\u2019t noticed us. Fact is, we look an awful lot like a fantasy baseball league. This maybe isn\u2019t the best time to admit it, but we believe in sharing the wealth. Simply put, the earth belongs to us all. We need to distribute its bounty in a fair and equitable way. And most radical of all, we believe that the people who do the bulk of the work \u2013 making and building and growing things, teaching people, healing people, serving people, and hauling away our trash deserve more money than the insurance company executives who live to say no to cancer patients.
\n<\/br>
\nFreddy Engels got us all hats with the ISC logo: the International Socialist Cabal. If you haven\u2019t seen us in action, you should know that the ISC is a pretty feisty bunch. Between you and me, everything got a bit crazy at our last meeting. You probably read the latest poll: 40% of you think Barack Obama\u2019s a socialist. Reading about it sent Betty Marks into a rage.
\n<\/br>
\nYou could hear her in the bakery section: \u201cIt\u2019s not often that we call people out, but really how many chances does the guy deserve?\u201d
\n<\/br>
\nBefore you know it, half the group was in an uproar. With some people complaining that he sold us out. And, even worse, suggesting that he\u2019s giving us a bad name.
\n<\/br>
\nBetty White reminded us that he bailed out free enterprise by giving away trillions of dollars to the very banks and investment houses that wiped out the equity of millions of Americans. Betty fumed, \u201cThen he allows these guys their million\/billion dollar bonuses for wiping out our retirement plans.\u201d
\n<\/br>
\nThat\u2019s when Chairperson Mo reminded us, \u201cHey, he\u2019s a rookie. Everyone makes mistakes.\u201d
\n<\/br>
\nNorman Thomas gets very excited at these meetings \u2013 it\u2019s probably all the soda he drinks \u2013 but Norman, trembling a bit, started to rant about health care. \u201cThe guy spends his time meeting with health insurance and drug company execs and sells out the public option. He\u2019s forcing twenty million more people to buy health insurance from the same companies that rip us off. Yeah, maybe there are a few good things about it, but without real competition, our rates will just go up and up. Not to mention my blood pressure!\u201d
\n<\/br>
\nThat\u2019s when Morris Finster made the motion to publically expel him. Annabelle Bach-Choye reminded us that he wasn\u2019t really a member, and probably has a full-time personal shopper. Which got Norman Thomas going again: \u201cThe guy has so much money these days he doesn\u2019t even need Buy One, Get One Free.\u201d
\n<\/br>
\nBut still some of us said, \u201cGive the guy a break. Look what he inherited from Bush. He\u2019s living in a new house. Probably not getting enough exercise.\u201d
\n<\/br>
\nFi Dell wasn\u2019t so forgiving: \u201cAllowing the oil and gas companies the right to drill off-shore when he won\u2019t fairly tax their outrageous profits, that\u2019s it for me.\u201d
\n<\/br>
\nMorris Finster called for a vote: it was six for expulsion and six against.
\n<\/br>
\nDebby Eugene was turning red. And couldn\u2019t control herself: \u201cZippo on global warming; no real jobs program; never closed Guantanamo; lousy on civil liberties \u2026 And give me a break \u2013 the guy plays basketball. It\u2019s not about exercise. \u201c
\n<\/br>
\nThe tide turned for good when Emma Goldperson weighed in: \u201cWhat about the asinine decision to go to war alongside Hamid Karzai \u2013 a crook with an even more crooked brother in Afghanistan. After all we learned in Iraq.\u201d
\n<\/br>
\nMorris Finster put down his slice of mushroom pizza and called for another vote. It was twelve for expulsion. Game over.
\n<\/br>
\nEven Chairperson Mo had to agree: \u201cBarack Obama is the World\u2019s Worst Socialist.\u201d
\n<\/br>
\nWhich is when Morris Finster began the Wave and Harry Simpson, the Assistant Manager of the Food Court suggested we shift our meetings to Price Chopper.<\/p>\n
____________________________________________________________________________<\/p>\n
Mickey Friedman still owes Freddy Engel $17.50 for his ISC hat.
\n<\/br>
\n<\/br>
\nThe Berkshire Record, Thursday April 8, 2010. \u00a9 Mickey Friedman. All rights reserved.
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